Responsive Practices for Parents

Welcome Parents! Fall is here. We hope all is well with you and your family. Whether your child is participating in Remote Instruction or starting back to In-Person Instruction this fall, we hope you are finding success in navigating through this challenging time for all.

In this edition, you will find the following topics:

• ABCs of Behavior
• Structure, Routines and Reinforcement at Home
• Eight Tips to Promote Engagement in Schoolwork
• The Power of Positive Attention
• How to Get Your Children to Listen
• Behavior Toolbox
• Parent Connection - Reducing Stressors by Creating Predictability in the Home
• PBIS and Restorative Practices for Parents

We know that managing behavior at home during this time can be very difficult. We wish it could be as easy as A, B, and C. Managing behavior is never easy but if you follow the principles of the "ABCs" of behavior it can help guide you to better outcomes at changing behavior.

What are the “ABCs” of behavior you ask? Let us take a look.

• A is for Antecedents - also known as triggers that cause the behavior to occur.
• B is for Behavior - specifically the behavior that you want to target for change.
• C is for Consequences - the actions that happen right after the behavior occurs.

Managing the “ABCs” of behavior can successfully help prevent the behavior from occurring as often or at all, as opposed to allowing the behavior to continue occurring in the future.

The first step is to define the behavior you want to see changed or improved. Be specific as possible when defining the behavior so you know exactly what you are measuring for improvement.

The next step is to manage the antecedents that are triggers for the behavior to occur. Try to manage your behavior to help prevent the triggers from occurring. Also be aware of environmental factors that may cause the behavior to occur, such as hunger, fatigue, anxiety or distractions.

Lastly, a very important step is implementing effective and consistent consequences. This step helps kids understand the difference between acceptable and unacceptable behaviors.

Some consequences to avoid are the following:

• Avoid giving negative attention. This can actually increase the behavior over time.
• Delayed consequences should be avoided. The most effective consequences are immediate. This helps your child link the behavior to the consequence.
• Disproportionate consequences. It is important to give consequences that are proportionate to the behavior - meaning, avoiding consequences that are too harsh compared to the behavior.

It is important to set clear expectations and consequences with your child. Consistency is the key to success. Keep in mind, we cannot change a person, but we can influence the way they behave by shaping the environment around them.

We hope that learning the "ABCs" of behavior helps to empower you to find ways to replace your child’s undesirable behaviors with more desirable behaviors.

Reference:

Child Mind Institute

During this challenging time of Fall 2020, families and teachers are struggling to help children learn from home and/or at school. Many students are having problems with staying motivated and focused on schoolwork.

Click on the image to the left to see eight tips for parents and caregivers to help promote creativity and engagement in schoolwork for children participating in remote instruction and in-person instruction and some examples for each tip.

Children love attention especially from their parents and caregivers. They will take any attention they can get, positive attention or even negative attention. Some children are more starved for attention than others.

It is easy for us as parents or caregivers to focus more attention on our children when they are doing something that we don’t like, rather than giving attention to them when they are doing things that we do like. Naturally, if we focus more attention on them when we are correcting their behavior than praising their behavior, then we will probably see more negative behaviors than positive ones.

Behaviorists say, “you get more of what you are looking for than what you are not looking for.” With that in mind, if we focus our attention on our children to praise them more often than correcting them, then we can expect to see them exhibit positive behaviors more than those unwanted behaviors.

Reference:

Child Mind Institute

Click on the links below to read more information on the benefits of providing positive attention and our positive emotions to children and teens.

• For children: https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/connecting-communicating/connecting/positive-attention
• For teens: https://kidshealth.org/en/teens/power-positive.html

Also, take a look at this video to see three types of attention we give our children and which type works the best.

Would you like to know how to get kids to listen without raising your voice? Sometimes our kids don't listen to us until after we've asked them 10 times and resort to yelling. While we are training them, they are training us.

Watch this video to learn strategies that will encourage them to listen without us raising our voices.

Are you and/or your children experiencing increased stress and anxiety levels? Please click on the images below to watch videos with ways to help reduce stress levels in your daily life.

Trying new ideas for managing your children’s behavior and getting them to listen, adding structure and routine to your home and helping your children learn whether at home or at school can be easier to do if you are caring for yourself too! Taking time to care for yourself can increase the chance of being a better, calmer, healthier parent especially during such challenging times. Taking Care of yourself does not have to be expensive, overwhelming or hard to do. Choose one or two things to get started.

Click on the picture for some ideas.

Sometimes it's hard to realize when you aren’t taking care of yourself and instead are spending all of your energy taking care of the needs of your children. Pay attention to signs that you may need to do more to take care of yourself such as:

To all the parents out there: you are doing an amazing job! But remember to take a moment for yourself, to breath, stretch, whatever you need to keep being your best self. Hang in there and keep up the great work!

Click here to watch the video.

According to the Center for Positive Behavioral Interventions and Support, or PBIS, "over 25,000 schools have embraced PBIS as a highly effective way to build children’s social-emotional-behavioral skills and reduce challenging behaviors." PBIS is an evidence-based commitment to school systems that impact students' behavior positively. When implemented with fidelity, student academic and social outcomes improve and schools become places of inclusion, not exclusion. Parents can use PBIS principles at home to support all family members during this time of remote learning.

SET ROUTINES

Structure and predictable routines can help students do better in school At home, structure and routines can help everyone get on a schedule, encourage family bonding, and independence. Setting routines can also help establish habits and create a sense of safety and stability. Routines should be created for the following activities:

• Waking up and Bedtime
• Meals
• Movement
• Learning
• Social time or a time to connect

SET HOME EXPECTATIONS

At school, setting clear classroom expectations helps motivate students to take personal responsibility to improve their learning and behavior. At home, we can set clear expectations to let our family know what we expect from them in all settings.

Here is an example of what being safe, respectful and responsible may look like at school and at home.

Classroom:

• Be Respectful: Raise your hand before speaking
• Be Responsible: Turn in your homework when it is due
• Be Safe: Walk when holding scissors

Virtual Classroom:

• Be Respectful: Keep background noise to a minimum when engaged in lesson
  
• Be Responsible: Do your best work and turn in your homework when it is due
• Be Safe: Keep open drink away from computer keyboard

TEACH, REMIND, and REWARD EXPECTED BEHAVIORS with POSITIVE FEEDBACK

Students do better when they know what the expectation is, practice it, receive feedback and are acknowledged when cooperating with the teacher. It is not enough to say, "be respectful, responsible and safe," we should teach what this looks like.

For example:

Be Responsible: Do your best work

• Teach: Describe what “doing your best” means in your home. Examples might include focusing on your work, reading/listening to all instructions before beginning, asking for help when needed, and sticking with it until done. Discuss what this looks like (and does not look like) across the types of learning activities.
• Remind: At the start of the day and at the beginning of new or difficult activities, remind children to “do their best work.”
• Reward with Positive Feedback: When you see your child doing their best, provide specific praise. “It’s great to see you doing your best! I think you’ll be proud of your work!”

MODEL and PROMOTE EMOTIONAL WELLNESS

We have never experienced a school year like the one we are in right now. We may be feeling stress and anxiety during this time of extended school closure. Everyone reacts differently to stressful situations and how we respond will make an impact on our family. Take breaks, take care of your body and make time for enjoyable activities. Modeling these behaviors will not only help you but will show and teach your child how to cope during stressful situations. It is important to continue to monitor your needs and your child’s, and contact your healthcare provider if you have immediate or ongoing concerns.

Using PBIS at home can help students and caregivers, feel supported.

Please click on this video to see ways to help create structure, consistent routines, and motivation systems at home.

References

Supporting Families with PBIS at Home. (2020, March). Center for PBIS. Retrieved October, 22, 2020, https://www.pbis.org/resource/supporting-families-with-pbis-at-home

One fundamental goal for Restorative Practices is to build and maintain healthy relationships. Without a doubt, when individuals maintain healthy relationships with others, there is an abundance of personal growth and higher levels of academic success for students in schools.

The Restorative Practice strategies you will learn to:

· Apply structure for your child throughout the day

· Use a Restorative Approach to manage behavior at home

· Use Restorative Questions in conversations when disciplining your child

· Incorporate Family Reflection- “Restorative Circles for the Family”

Click on the picture for tools to use while at home with your children.

Email: amontemayor1@saisd.net
Website: saisd.net
Location: 439 Arbor Place, San Antonio, Texas 78207, USA
Phone: 210-354-9565