
How Are We Led?
Tips for Clerks and Members in a Quaker School Setting
Friends Decision Making Process
These ideas are pulled from Arthur Larabee, Parker Palmer, my experiences at PYM Meetings, and BFM Meetings. They are meant as one interpretation, inspired by many experienced teachers.
Unity is not the same as Unanimity
It is important to know that this is a Quaker School not a Meeting – there is a difference
Schools are a hybrid structure – constrained by time, hierarchy, need to move forward – clerks need to lead the group to a product
Meetings are completely egalitarian – clerks are really just facilitators
Sense-of-the-Meeting Decision Making
- Listen beyond the self
- Release after speaking
- separate personal preferences from what may be different right outcomes for the group
- Create a climate of safety for all to speak candidly
- Unite when possible, stand aside when appropriate
- Seek unity about a sense of the meeting, not the matter at hand
- Be present with clerking consciousness
Arthur M. Larrabee
1. Begin the Meeting:
- Wait to be recognized in order to maintain equity
- Address the Meeting or the Clerk, not each other
- Allow silent space between thoughts/voices
- Allow the quiet voices or the hesitant voices opportunity
Remind participants that each has an obligation to the Meeting:
It is every member's duty to speak their own truth - that is an important element that each member has agreed upon in entering this community.
- Silence signifies agreement
- Speak your truth
- Be open to a third/new way
- Don't fall in love... trust each other and be willing to accept new and unfamiliar approaches to an idea or dilema
Continuing Revelation:
We will value the Quaker idea of continuing revelation, knowing that we are not tasked with creating the perfect thing that will be carved in stone forever, rather we are working toward something that works for right now and that can continue to grow and evolve over time.
2. Share the Agenda:
3. State the Reason for the Meeting:
Level 1: "I will make the decision and I am not seeking input."
Level 2: "I will make the decision and I am seeking input."
Level 3: "We will make the decision together."
Level 4: "You will make the decision and tell me what you have decided."
Craig Sellers, HOS Friends Central School
Sense of the Meeting:
Let the Meeting know that you will state the sense of the meeting often. This allows the members time and space to be reflective about the decision making process and to provide their feedback if they have not yet done so or if they disagree with the sense.
Some responses to the Sense of the Meeting might be:
- I approve/agree (Better yet, use your hand!)
- I’m not clear/need clarification
- It’s not what I would do/ It doesn’t feel quite right to me, but I’m not led to resist
- I don’t see it, but I trust others and the faith/certainty that they have
- I disapprove/don’t agree
An important thing about Sense of the Meeting:
For example, I may not agree that making Terra Cotta Warriors in 4th Grade is the best way for students to demonstrate their understanding. However, I can agree that I hear that most of the voices in the room are sharing that they think this project is appropriate. So, while I disagree about the project, I can agree that it seems to be the Sense of the Meeting.
4. The Meeting:
A good clerk is a strong listener. It's a good idea to notice who is doing all the talking in a meeting. What might that mean? How might that reflect equity, equality, and ethical leadership?
- Facilitate
- Don't participate
- Notice
- Ask for clarification
- Rephrase and repeat if necessary
- Interrupt to adjust (offer reminders about sharing time, repeating, addressing the Meeting, staying on topic)
- Keep time
Members' of the Meeting responsibilities:
- Listen
- Be open
- Address the Meeting
- Wait to be recognized
- Be mindful of the role of the Clerk
- Remain in Community
- Be teachable
- Be respectful
Speak and Release
5. End on Time with Shared Silence
Overheard at Meeting:
- Your clerk senses tension around this issue/idea/topic.
- Someone might be saying that they have a different idea than the Sense of the Meeting.
- Someone may be getting emotional or upset
"I feel we need to take 5 minutes to center ourselves/thinking. If someone feels they need to speak to the tension, they may do so."
Denise Coffin
Email: coffind@sidwell.edu
Website: www.sidwell.edu
Location: Washington, DC, United States
Twitter: @teamcoffin